TO SEE HIM SMILE AGAIN

Memories of Tita Arnie - her cremated ashes in an urn,
her beautiful picture,
and a framed copy of her favorite prayer.  

The past two months seemed like a hell on earth for my best guy buddy, Jeremy Laguda. His mom, 53 years old, succumbed to endometrial cancer. It was not easy for Jeremy since his mom died just five days after he happily celebrated his 21^st birthday with her.  

Since after the cremation of his mom, I have been monitoring my buddy. Dark clouds of despair and desperation enveloped his once very happy life.  He changed. I am now having a hard time making him smile. My jokes won’t cut the invisible threads that are somewhat being sewn on his lips, preventing him to smile again. My usual ways of cheering him up every time he is down is now a big failure. He seemed really affected of the loss of his beloved mom. For almost a month now, I have been thinking of ways on how to at least help him hurdle over this roadblock in his life – to help him accept the fact that death is constant in this world and all we have to do is to grieve over the loss, accept the things that we cannot change or bring back, and move on with life. I really want to see him smile again.

Photo Credit: www.byahilo.com

Surfing the internet about smiles, I have jumped into an article that featured Bacolod City, the city of smiles in the Philippines. Cultivating my curiosity, I dug deeper trying to research why it's called the city of smiles. And this is what I’ve read:

“The moniker reflects the general disposition of the locals. In the 1980s, a period of tragedy and economic dislocation enveloped the city with gloom. During this period, the prices of sugar in the world market were at an all-time low and the Bacolenos were in a crisis as the province only relied in the sugar industry then. The depression was further aggravated when a passenger vessel Don Juan sank on Aprill 22, where an estimated 700 Negrenses including prominent families perished.

In the midst of these tragic events, the city’s artists, local government and civic groups decided to hold a festival of smiles, the MassKara Festival. They reasoned that a festival was also a good opportunity to pull the residents out of the pervasive gloomy atmosphere. The initial festival was therefore, a declaration by the people of the city that no matter how tough and bad the times were, Bacolod City is going to pull through, survive, and in the end, triumph.”

Source: http://www.themasskarafestival.com/about-masskara/why-masskara/

Jeremy and I during my college graduation.

BINGO! I told myself “This is the perfect place to bring my best buddy! And the MASSKARA festival is the perfect festival to help him forget the worries of life and just enjoy experiencing the festival.” I really want to make him smile again. I want to bring him with me to Bacolod City for an adventure of a lifetime.  To explore a city that would welcome us with sincere warmth and experience a festival that excites our senses. SEE the warm smiles of the locals of Bacolod City. HEAR the festive sounds of the rolling drums during the Masskara Festival. FEEL the non-stop energy of its dancers. TASTE delicious delicacies in a dazzling dining scene. And just BREATHE easy and smile and laugh all day.

Life is short. And I just don't want time to pass without me helping my best guy buddy get back to his old happy self and appreciate the beauty of life. I am now very excited to see him smile again at the MassKara Festival in Bacolod City this October. Thank you in advance, AirPhil Express! =)

Experience MassKara Festival, Hermosa Festival and Lanzones Festival this October. Airphil Express flies daily to BACOLOD, ZAMBOANGA and CAGAYAN DE ORO from Cebu and Manila. Visit www.airphilexpress.com to book!

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ACCEPTING WHAT IS DONE IS DONE

I have learned so many lessons in life lately. I guess it's just part of growing up. I've experienced happiness, hurt, betrayal, paranoia - a salad of feelings.

I've been hurt... very hurt a lot of times this year. I cried a river. Nah, I think that's just understated. I cried an OCEAN. There were nights when I wasn't able to sleep. But at the end of those storms, I learned that people make mistakes. Sometimes, people just don't know what they are doing. This means that, if in the past people have behaved badly towards you, it wasn't necessarily because they meant to be horrid, but because they were as naive, as foolish, as human as the rest of us. They made mistakes in the way they brought you up or finished a relationship with you, or whatever, not because they wanted to do it that way, but because they didn't know any different. I make mistakes too. And I realize that I made one only after I have hurt someone. Realizing that we have made a mistake and feeling sorry for it make us a person, a real one. But I am not giving anyone license here to hurt anybody just because of the reason that we are all human.

What I want to point out is learning the lesson. You can let go of any feelings of resentment, of regret, of anger. You can accept that you are a fabulous human being because of all the bad things that have happened to you, NOT INSPITE OF THEM. What is done is done and you need to just get on with things. You could let all these things get you down, fizzle away internally like some emotional acid making you ill and resentful and stuck. But you should let them go, embrace them as character-forming and in general as positive rather than negative.

To end, let us learn to accept what is done is done... TO LET GO OF THE BAD MEMORIES AND TO RETAIN THE GOOD ONES... There is no going back, only forwards. So friends, KEEP MOVING FORWARDS!


P.S.

VJ Ruado wants to hear from you! If you want to suggest a topic, ask an advice, or just comment on my blog posts, just press the 0 comment/s icon below. If you are not a member of the Blogspot, you may choose the option OTHERS as your identity and please don't forget to put your name so I can include you in my next post's acknowledgment. Keep reading! Thank you.

THE 2008 ADVENTURES AND MISADVENTURES

2008 was a whirlwind of good and not-so-good memories for me. It was a salad of tests, trials, successes, failures, happiness, loneliness, smiles and tears. Come and join me as I take a look at my most memorable adventures and misadventures of the past year.

MISADVENTURE #1: DENGUE HEMORRAGHIC FEVER, MITRAL VALVE PROPublish PostLAPSE, MITRAL REGURGITATION (February and March)
Yes, the year started with me getting confined in the hospital, not just once but twice. If there's an ADVANTAGE or REWARD CARD for frequent admissions in a hospital, I am very sure I have earned a lot of reward points right now. Had six (6) bags of platelet concentrate transfused in my body, experienced a very low platelet count of 21, bleeding gums, a very dark skin complexion and a near-death experience. Experienced ECG and HOLTER MONITOR and discovered that I do have a not-so-normal heart.

I was this thin!

MISADVENTURE #2: A STOLEN PHONE

Yes, my phone was stolen. Nokia 1112. That's just after I went out of the hospital and was trying to live normally again. Yet BOOM, got Mr. Bad Luck always on my side.

ADVENTURE #1: THE COMPREHENSIVE EXAMINATION 3 (May)

At last, got my first memorable adventure last MAY 2008 when I passed the Comprehensive Examination 3. Well, I might be a pro in failing these Departmental Comprehensive Exams but yey, I passed this time...take one! Thirty-three (33) units of subjects, two (2) weeks of taking the examination, grueling study periods and praise God I passed! Yey!

ADVENTURE #2: THE FEASIBILITY STUDY DEFENSE (June)

After more than a year of doing the study, after series of cancelled defense attempts, I finally did it. With top caliber Graduate School panel (Dr. Merlyn Mendoza - College of Business Dean, Dr. Reuben Carpizo - Graduate School Professor, and Dr. Reuel Narbarte - University HR Director and Graduate School Professor, and it was his first time to sit as one of the panelists in the Undergraduate School), I did it. It was a brave move to face them and everything I did paid off. I am extremely happy to get an Excellent / A grade from them and I am so thankful to Dr. Marta Macalalad, my FS Adviser, for guiding and teaching me to face my fears.

MISADVENTURE #3: THE DEPRESSING FIRST PREBOARD EXAMINATION RESULT (July)

It was my birth month but it didn't bring me a good gift. Had a 62% grade in Auditing Problems and it was really bad. Really really bad. Expectators (my term for those people who always expects a lot from me, a combination of expectations and spectators) got disappointed and they got me disappointed also for expecting a lot from me.

ADVENTURE #3: A NEW NOKIA 5700 ExpressMusic PHONE (September)

Thanks to my family, they got me a new phone, mmm...edit...my dream phone! I didn't really expect to have it since I got a phobia anymore that it might get stolen again. The phone is really perfect for my lifestyle and I just feel so really blessed that I have it.

ADVENTURE #4: CE BICOL TOUR (September)

At last, I got myself to Bicol and it was with my close friends, with the Celestial Echoes! Sang Bukunat Woman again for the 5th straight year and I'm very happy I still get the audience's laughs for doing it. I was so happy to get reunited with my good friend and kuya...DOC URIEL and he toured me and our little brother Jeremy around his place. He also brought the CE to a Hot Spring which made us feel relaxed and break out of school activities for hours. Ahhh... I miss th0se moments so much.

The Overjoyed Celestial Echoes

Hotties in a Hot Spring!

The Suplado Brothers


CPA. NURSE. DENTIST.

ADVENTURE #5: REVENGE SERVED COLD (September)

I passed the Review School of Accountancy's Final Preboard Examination with flying colors. The First Preboard Exam result got me really hurt but I used that event to push myself more, to strive more, and with the help of our Almighty Father, VJ ranked 1st in AUP, 2nd in Region 4 and 11th in the review school. Praise God!

ADVENTURE #6: BIYAHE TAYO (October and November)


I had a three-week vacation in Davao, a three-day surprise holiday getaway in Boracay, a 12-hour historical tour in Cebu City and a one-week relaxation in my hometown, Iligan City. And I am hoping for more trips this year because I just discovered that I love travelling.

Beach Body...sige Buddy nalang. =)

Cebu Pacific!!!

MISADVENTURE #4: LOST MY WALLET (December)


Two (2) ATMs, P200.00, my best friend's picture, MAMC Clinic Visitation Cards and other loyalty cards were in my lost wallet. I didn't know how it got lost and I am not planning to exert an extra effort finding it out. I just really hope who ever has my wallet got really blessed. =)


MISADVENTURE #5: CANCELLED TRIPS (December)

I was planning to spend Christmas with a very good friend and the New Year with my family, had tickets already but the trips got cancelled for the reason I cannot disclose. Maybe it was just not the right time or God's time and I am trying myself to believe that there is always a next time.Cancelled.

What a year for me, right? But I am so grateful to the Lord for it...for all the blessings that have come my way in 2008 and the misadventures I have encountered during the past year too because it made me reflect and learn from them in the hopes of improving myself and my relationships with people and most of all, with God for the coming year. HAPPY NEW YEAR to all of us!




PS:


ADVENTURE #7 AND MISADVENTURE #6: I GOT FAT!

Adventure because "YeY!" I got fat for the first time, but "Yayks!", I got a big big belly na! Laugh trip! =)

BIGGER! =)

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